I started this blog in January and this is the 63rd blog that I have written this year. I have tried my best to, not only, give insight into what is going on with me as I walk along this journey, but I have also tried to be encouraging to the thousands of you who have read these along the way. As I have told you from the beginning, I do this for me first… I want to be public in my changes because it brings accountability all around me. I also do it because I hope that people find hope in my story as they are walking along their own journey. I hope you know that it’s okay to invest in yourself first, in terms of living a healthy lifestyle.
Since I told you I would be honest with you all along this journey… here it goes.
I’m coming up on a year working with Jamie Free and the last month, avoided him. I didn’t ask for a check in and I didn’t want to have a check in. I knew I wasn’t eating on plan and I didn’t want to know my reality… that I could have been potentially ruining my work over the last year (I realize I’m being a little extreme, but that’s how I felt). I wasn’t completely off plan, but I was fudging here and there. Nothing crazy, but not on point.
Well, I had my check in last Friday… and I gained a little over a pound. Sure, that doesn’t seem like much, but that basically means I wasted a month of this journey. Wasted!
Great things happened in that month and I still reached goals that I didn’t think were possible… I was still moving forward. BUT… I wasted a whole month in terms of nutrition and weight loss. At this point in the game, that’s unacceptable. As much weight as I have lost, the weight doesn’t shed off like it used to in the beginning… that’s fine, but no progress after a month SUCKS! I’m pissed at myself and feel pretty drown about it.
I have plenty of excusses, but those are useless. The reality is that I completely wasted a month. Look back on my blog… I knew it was coming. I thought I was prepared… but NOPE! Not prepared and I didn’t handle it well.
Is this the end of my story… should I just give up? HECK NO!
Jamie put me in timeout… haha. Not really, but he asked me to log my food again and send it to him every three days…. more like Double Secret Probation.
In some ways I feel like I’m starting over and yet in others ways I feel like I am gaining control again. Maybe that tension is good. Either way, the journey continues. I just need to get my stuff together.
Here’s couple of things I’m learning:
- I need to figure out how to ask for help. I truly have no idea how to do that.
- Staying focused and remaining in the game takes discipline and I can’t let my discipline fade. I think I’ve done that lately.
Today I’m limping from the battle I’ve been loosing, but I’ll be walking without a limp soon. The last three days I’ve been focus and disciplined… that next three will be as well. If I have to simply take it one day at a time or three days at a time, I will get through this and I will come out on top. Mark my words!
Also, If you’ve read this far… thank you. I have some news coming up in the near future and I can’t wait to tall you about it so keep your eyes peeled.
If you see me please encourage me to Keep Going and the same goes for you… you are worth the work, the time, the effort, and the sacrifice…
Oh and I almost forgot… bye CJ! Thursday won’t be the same without you. Let me know when I can crash at your new place on the beach!