I’m coming up on two years of this fitness journey. Two years ago I started a food plan that changed the game for me and my CrossFit journey. Thanks to Jamie Free, I have received a whole new lease on life with a new lifestyle, body, and activity level. It’s pretty awesome!
Have I arrived yet? Have I done all that I started out to do? NOPE! But I’m loving the journey.
A little over a year ago I changed jobs and my family and I moved. It was a rough year for our girls in school, but they have been awesome and I couldn’t imagine a better situation for them now.
The people in my current job, don’t know the “before” me. They all aren’t following the FitBy40 IG or reading my blog. They predominantly are unaware of the miraculous life change I’ve had. Even when I talk about it, people don’t get it. I mean, how can they? They only know the me that in front of them. Not the me that’s been through the shitter of struggling with body image, self-worth, depression, self-isolation, and self-hatred.
After all… you don’t know, what you don’t know.
To be clear… I’m not a guy that you would pick out of a line up as ripped, beautifully gorgeous, or toned. I’m sure that I still look like an overweight guy who might be active. (I really don’t know what I look like to other people, but I know I don’t get hit on, so I’m not quite Brad Pitt. #goals.)
Anyways… I’m setting up the situation….
I got stopped the other day at work, as I was walking through the front office, and asked a question.
The question: Do you still get those meals you were eating all the time?
I said, No. I don’t get those anymore. It’s a great great company and they make some great food to keep your nutrition on track. Are you interested in them?
The person said no, that they were just curious. Then they asked why I don’t get them anymore. I said, that they just stopped coming. I tried to explain that I was a sponsored athlete but I think that my time had expired with them.
They though I was joking or lying and I had to explain to them that I really did get my meals for free and how awesome it was for the last year-plus. They were having a tough time understanding my a company would want to invest in me in that way. After all, I’m not a famous athlete or anything.
Then they said it…
They, feeling funny I guess, then said: “Maybe they stopped coming because you ate too many of them. They couldn’t afford it anymore”.
Why the hell do people do that? I’d love to tell you that those words didn’t bother me. That I just let them go and moved on. But this happened last week and it still hurts.
I wanted to use a lot of “F” words to tell them what I thought about their statement. I didn’t. I just walked off. After all, I am at work. You can’t act like someone who can’t control their feelings at work. You have to be in control and take your leadership seriously. BUT… it hurt and it hurt bad.
I felt like a teenager again. I felt like I didn’t have the power I had gained. I felt like all my work wasn’t worth it because this person clearly doesn’t see it. I gave that person too much power and I regret giving them that power in my life.
So how do I take back my power? I’m going to get my feelings out… voice them. Be open about my journey, like I’ve always been. I’m sure as hell not going to let those words derail my life, but I also have to allow myself to feel the feels and move on.
So, today I’m moving on. I’m not going to allow that person to mess-up another day. I’m going to keep training and focus on kicking ass at a competition this weekend. (Which is my third completion in the last month)
As you interact with people in your life, please don’t forget that words matter and they can hurt people. Speak with people with words of love and grace. Strive to build people up around you and not break them down. Help the people around you have a better life than you had and for goodness sake, be different… be you… and love who you are and who you are becoming.
Keep Going Team!